So I’m afab and lately I've been thinking that i might be trans. I’ve always felt I was a bit different, but I never paid much attention to it. I didn’t hate my body and I wasn’t uncomfortable with people referring to me as a she, so I thought I was just a girl with a more masculine personality and interests. However lately it's gotten worse. I don’t like my body, interacting with people (even my closest friends and family) is stressful and I feel humiliated every time I have to speak.
I feel like coming out as a trans guy would solve most of my problems, but at the same time it scares me. I feel selfish and guilty, like I’m gonna fail my family and i somehow did this to myself, which i know doesn’t make any sense but my brain won’t stop telling me that the way i feel is all my fault. I’m also scared that I'll never be happy because of this.
Just wanted to talk about this here since I don't know who to tell. Thanks for reading :)
Honey, you aren't selfish and you shouldn't feel ANY guilt. You've done NOTHING wrong. If coming out as trans would help you, go for it! I know I'm making it sound super easy, and I get that it really isn't. Gosh, I'm not out as non-binary. But from what it sounds like, for you, at least, coming out would help you accept who you are and make you feel better. Don't worry about what other people will say or think because they love YOU for YOU and nothing else. But if you don't think you're ready to come out, or you don't think it's right for you, don't feel pressured to. You can do whatever you feel you want/need to whenever it feels right. So if you want to come out... do it! They will LOVE you, no matter what. You aren't failing anyone by being your authentic self, I promise you.