Sorry about the super messy stuff, its late and I just really need to get this off my chest and talk to some strangers who have an outside perspective. Thank you so much.
Ok, so
1. US politics
Im a dual citizen (US and Canada) and with all the stuff going on right now like roe vs wade probably going to be overturned and what that could mean for other important ruling like the same sex marriage one and stuff, im just feeling really helpless and like my friends who are all Canadians don’t really get how much i feel like this affects me.
2. Gender & Sexuality
After 3 years of contemplation i figured out 5 months ago that I’m Demisexual biromantic with a strong preference for girls. However, I’m now costantly second guessing myself and wondering if I’m maybe lesbian since I’ve never been attracted to a guy or enby person but with the whole Demisexual thing and also having A LOT of trouble figuring out if a feeling is for romantic sexual or emotional attraction. Im also second guessing the Demisexual bit too and wondering if I’m maybe Acespike or Aegosexual. I’m also invalidating my whole exploration as well because maybe I’m just like (as bad as it sounds) confuse and sometimes I know it’s just internalized homophobia but sometimes I don’t and it’s really hard.
3. Mental health
During late 2019/early 2020 I was in a really bad mental place. I wasn’t capital-D depressed (at least I don’t think so) but I was just feeling really alone and lost and sad all the time. I managed to get myself out of there but recently I’ve been having times where I just get super overwhelmed and will just feel like all I want to do is cry in fetal position for the rest of my life. I also have EXTREMELY high expectations for myself that I’ve compiled into what I call the life plan (which is a whole other thing) and the entire bubble I build from that has popped and I just feel like I’m losing control and it’s scary and I hate it.
4. Also
Dating advice on how to tell a girl that you really like her and want to keep dating even though you might not be in a great spot right now she really helps you? And even though your in Europe and she’s not and you won’t see her until September you want to start dating again then?
hi @maralilydare
first off, i'm so sorry you have to worry about all of this. no matter what you tell yourself, you don't deserve to. secondly, i'm not an expert in some of these topics. so, i'm just gonna talk about the ones i know about, because i don't wanna risk spreading misinformation.
2. sexualities are confusing. i've been questioning mine for years. i do, though, know i'm asexual, and i get how confusing it is to distinguish attractions.
the thing is, you might never be able to label exactly how you're feeling. but the thing is, that's okay. you're not obligated to have words to express what you're feeling. no one else deserves an explanation. however, if you still want a label, my advice is this: you can be bi and never attracted to a single man in your ENTIRE lifetime. it's all about how YOU want to identify and what words YOU'RE comfortable attaching to yourself. labels are meant to make you feel more comfortable in yourself, not less
3. i'm not gonna lie to you. life is shit sometimes. you can't always control it. you're gonna fall short of expectations. you're gonna fail. you're gonna screw up.
but guess what? that's okay.
plans can be changed. i know it's scary and you don't want to, but sometimes change is for the better.
it's OKAY if you're not okay. and it's okay if you're scared. and it's okay if you're sad. you're valid. whatever you feel is valid. i know it's scary, i know it's hard. i know you just want to give up. but it's okay. you will make a new plan. you will make a new bubble. and you will be okay
4. my advice: just have a conversation. just sit down with her and talk about what you want. communication is the easiest way and safest way for everyone involved. your partner can't read your mind, nor can you read theirs. just talk about what you both want. it might hurt, but it will be worth it in the end
5 (anxiety). this is honestly the same advice as #4. just sit down with them and explain what you want or need, and ask them to provide it. and if they're not willing, try sitting with a school councilor, teacher, or a trusted adult.
hope this helped and sorry it was so long!
Also forgot to add this in (sorry) but I’ve been thinking that I might have Angxity (cant spell sorry) and I don’t know how to ask my parents if I can talk to someone about it. I’m in highschool for some context. Thanks