There's a lot happening to my brain right now. I realized I'm Genderfluid, and am more confident in that than I was in being Nonbinary, and I really want to tell my parents and just live as Genderfluid, hopefully will do that soon, but I'm so scared. I'm worried about being out at school, and I'm pretty sure that my pronouns switch from she/her to they/them, but there are some days where I feel like he/him, so I'm kind of grappling with that. Today in particular, I'm feeling weird and dysphoric, annoyed for no reason and super tired due to waking up at 3:30 and 5 this morning. I told my family that I didn't want to watch an episode of a show that's kind of a family tradition since the pandemic since I really don't have the mental energy required and feel guilty because of it. I really want a binder, but I can't get one without my mom. I found a really great sounding group for LGBTQ+ teens from a creator I really like, but I'm scared to ask my mom to join. I'm also sort of just feeling melancholy because I just learned more about the AIDS epidemic, and that's really weighing on my soul. I want to tell my parents about my issues, but I don't want them to worry about me, and I especially don't want to bother them since some big stuff's going on with their jobs right now. I found out that what I do a lot to escape from the world is called maladaptive daydreaming, at that scares me since it sounds so serious. I feel like I do it too much, as well. Like I'll be having a conversation with somebody, then my mind will play it with my characters. It's getting harder to not make faces like I'm in the scenes in my head while I'm eating breakfast or something when someone else is watching. Sorry for posting so much, there's just a lot happening. You don't have to read all of this, I just wanted to put it out there.