I have been a lesbian for as long as I can remember. I officially came out at the start of the year. I am also non-binary and go by they/them, just for a bit of background.
I have been in heaps of relationships, and almost all of them turn out to be absolute flops. I can't seem to find someone who won't break my heart.
Recently, I am starting to think that I am asexual, or at least demisexual/demiromantic. I can fall head-over-heels for someone, we start dating, but then the thought of being touched by them, whoever it is, makes me feel like I'm gonna puke. Don't get me wrong, I am perfectly confident in my body, and letting whoever it is that I'm dating see me naked, and being intimate with them (kissing, holding hands, all that), but the thought of being touched makes me feel ill. Sometimes, it's not just being touched sexually that freaks me out, sometimes it's just being in a relationship at all. I can't seem to find a solution!!
Am I asexual? Or have I just not found 'the one' yet??
Please, help me, someone!
being asexual is not having sexual attraction towards any gender or identification, from what you wrote it’s seems to be sex repulsed, meaning you cant fathom having sex. you can still be lesbian and sex repulsed at the same time. That’s my take on what you said, but you identify with what you feel!!
I'm ace, but I don't know everything about it either. I am sex repulsed, but not as much as you described. Being touched does not make me feel like I'm gonna puke, it's just uncomfortable... but this is only my experience. I know a lot of ace people are sex repulsed the way you seem to be. This is completely OK and valid.
I just want to say you can be ace and feel romantic and aesthetic attraction, witch means you can fall in love and find someone very beautiful, but not wanting to do anything sexual with them, or being touched by them. Asexuality is a spectrum and every ace person has a different experience with it. There is some asexuals who need to fall in love in order to feel sexual attraction, but except if there was no love in your previous relationships, you are probably not one of them. For me, it looks like you are asexual, but realistically, I'm just a stranger on the internet who doesn't know much about you. I hope you'll figure this out. Once you have, I wish you a wonderfull life with a wonderfull partener who'll respect the wonderfull person that you are <3
(sorry if my english is bad, it's not my maternal language)
I'm ace, but I don't know everything about it. Asexuals can be sex repulsed, I am, but if you feel sexual attraction towards people you're not ace. It's different from romantic or aesthetic attraction but since I've never felt it, I can't really describe it, sorry... But people who aren't asexual usually aren't sex repulsed. They can be, but it's mostly from trauma. But of course you can be an ace lesbian, that would mean ace but romantically attracted to women. Again I don't know everything about this, it's just what I understood from being in ace spaces a lot, but I hope it helps!
Oh my gosh, thanks so much, that makes a lot of sense! Thank you for helping me!
I personally don't know much about being Asexual but may I suggest that you go to Trevor Space because it should have resources there that could provide you some clarity on you query. Here a link to it https://www.trevorspace.org/. I hope you find the answer you're looking for.